After listening to Hale complain that he hasn't been given blog authorship, I acquiesced and told him I would post the following. (I hope you all will continue to support me in my decision of non-authorship to some and to others, keep the video out of their hands)
The PCR bike ride this week is telling of the new low to
which this supposed band of brothers has sunk. Dunn was a no show, without
excuse. (Dunn, most of us knew where you were) Wood peeled off after summiting Big Mountain and long before everyone
else had planned to ride (Wood, old age is a bummer). Lloyd and Bruner broke
away from the group claiming that they wanted a ‘big ride” to Henefer (not
Hinifer; Ludlow, since when did Webster allow cowboys to come up with spelling
words?), proclaiming (but as you will see later, not showing) their biking
prowess. Briggs turned back early when faced with Mary’s Nightmare, leaving
Hale and Trabert to fend for themselves. But before Briggs, Bruner and Lloyd
parted company with Hale and Trabert, the former group of riders knew that
Hale’s rear tire had maybe 1 mile left in it, and that Hale could be left
stranded alone in the East Canyon wilderness area after Trabert left him at the
East Canyon dam. But that was a chance they were willing to take (Wood, thanks
for fostering that attitude). (I resemble that remark) Because Trabert is closet endorphin junkie, and
had to ride 100 miles, he said good bye to Hale at the dam, leaving him to fend
for himself against the blazing hot sun, with many miles of ascent left before
he would possibly arrive home safely on the eve of Father’s
Day.
This is where it gets interesting. As Hale was
approaching the back side of Big Mountain, an ominous task, he came across Lloyd
and Bruner at the East Canyon store. Obviously they did not go all the way to
Henefer. Sheepishly they greeted their forgotten brother, and feigned interest
in accompanying him on the grueling ride back home. But after reflecting for
less than a minute they announced they had to get home, so they said adios and
went on their way. Hale faced the task of summiting the back side of Big
Mountain alone, with his nearly crippled bike. Long after the dust settled on
the road from his brothers(?) who went before him, Hale, with much trepidation
made off on this daunting task—ALONE! About a third of the way up the
mountain his tire gave way, leaving him stranded without cell phone reception to
call for help from his family (on whom he knew he could rely for help) or shade
for comfort from the blazing hot sun--left to rely on the kindness of strangers
(Wood, you should know of play from which that line originates). In the end,
the kindness of strangers did pay off. Hale was taken home by a couple of kind
young strangers who took him home to Kathy. Upon arrival Kathy explained to
these kind people how she used to put Hale’s name and address on his helmet so
if it was lost the person who found it would know where to return it, but
because his biking buddies mocked him when they saw it saying “why would Kathy
want you returned to her”, she no longer engaged in that custom. She was
relieved that somehow they were able to bring him home in spite of the absence
of his address on his helmet.
I do not know why I bothered to write this story of woe;
it will no doubt not even be read by any of my supposed biking buddies, and even
if it were, it certainly will have no effect on their behavior. For anyone
reading this who wants to join this group I give you this caution: keep the
rubber side down and full because there isn’t anyone in this group who is going
to stay behind to save you!
These Fathers are having a GREAT DAY!
Trabert's TATS - "Never charge a machine gun nest with a rubber knife"
The Smoking Gun....
